Teachings

The secret to a soulful, healthy relationship

Relationships are everything!

 
I've heard people in the spiritual and self-development community say things like:
 
“You should be able to give everything to yourself”, “You shouldn't need anybody, you should only need yourself”.
 
But let me tell you this: We are relationships beings and as long as we live in this third dimension we need them.
 
When relationships are healthy, they contribute to many areas of your lives so we need to learn how to cultivate them, and there's a secret to it...
 

The secret to cultivating, healing and attracting healthy & soulful relationships

 
The secret ingredient of having magnificent relationships is to connect to what is REAL. To connect to Source.
 
In his book, The answer is you, Michael B. Beckwith says a relationship is stable when we are connected to Source. When the relationship to ourselves and to Source is happening.
 
The problem is, this isn't always happening.
 
How many of us get up in the morning and go straight to our phone? We connect to the exterior world the second we wake up. We forget there's a more important connection to cultivate, the connection to Source, to our highest self.
 
When you're disconnected from your highest self you can fall into the illusion that other people have to give you what you need. You unconsciously start asking those around you to resolve that disconnection. You expect others to take away the loneliness you may feel inside your soul.
 
And loneliness, let me tell you, is a pandemic too. So many people are suffering from loneliness. Even if they are in a relationship or surrounded by friends they still feel lonely. This is because loneliness comes from that disconnection to your highest self, and that’s why nothing outside can fill that gap.
 
So…
 

Why and how to return to my relationship with Source?

 
Why? Because you remember you are not lonely, that you've never been lonely. You remember there is a presence always walking by your side in the path you have chosen. But when you place your attention on everything outside of you, instead of connecting with yourself first, it's like trying to reach for something that never comes.
 
This then turns into manipulation, control, and fear. And when you enter any relationship you put all your hopes and expectations on others, getting disappointed if what you expect doesn’t happen.
 
This is when we most need to connect to our highest self. When connected to Source we are moved by the wisdom of the heart and this is ultimately what relationships need. You don't need techniques, or too much analysis, you need wisdom. Wisdom will guide you through the tough days, during the dark night of the soul.
 
Knowing the why, let's now talk about how to reconnect.
 

You get your sit together!

 
Read that again. You get your sit together. This means, every morning before you connect with the world, you go to your meditation chair and connect with yourself. You allow yourself at least 30 minutes of pure silence. You start engaging in these practices that nurture your relationship with Source.
 
Having a strong relationship with Source is having a healthy sense of identity, and this helps you:
  1. Have healthier relationships because you own your identity. You know your identity is not determined by another person. Thus, there is more freedom in the relationship (you let go of control, fear, and anxiety).
  2. Navigate gracefully any separation process because you know your identity is not defined by anyone outside of you.
  3. Attract relationships with your same level of energy.
 
 
Once you get your sit together something amazing starts happening: You start having dominion over your attention.
 
In relationships, we are very prone to been triggered. Having dominion over our attention is important. It's having the capacity to stop, to remember our connection to Source, and to recognize what is real.
 
And what is real?
 
- That all that occurs in your life is not a mistake, it's always for you.
 
- That we live in an abundant Universe.
 
- That we are worthy of abundance and love.
 
- That it is safe to trust the flow of life.
 
- That you are not alone. You are guided every step of the way.
 
So if you're struggling with a relationship right now, or if you want to make your relationships healthier and soulful, engage in these practices.
 
Connect to Source. That's the most important relationship you'll ever have. Let yourself be moved by wisdom. Get your sit together every morning. Have dominion over your attention. Finally, remember what is real.
 
When your relationship to Source, to your highest self, is on point, every other relationship will be on point as well. You will experience more freedom in your life.
 
That's the secret!

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